Revising
　　
　　Now that you written a first draft and set it aside for a few days, you are ready to go back and start revising it. Later you may be asking other people, such as friends or teachers, to read your essays and offer their comments and suggestions.
　　The first step in revising is to re-read your essay. The first time that you re-read your essay, do not mark any corrections on it. Reading the essay uninterrupted will help you understand how your essay fits together.
　　In subsequent readings, read to revise. When you read for the purpose of revising, you should read from a particular point of view -- the reader's. Imagine that you are reading an essay written by a stranger. Be critical in asking yourself questions about your essay.
　　There are many elements of your essay to focus on when revising. You can examine your essay as a whole, or as whole paragraphs, to revise items like theme, structure, and general content. Bob calls these items, "big picture items." You can also examine your essay on the sentence or word level, focusing on details like spelling, grammar, and diction. Bob calls these details, "little picture details." Check out Bob's revision tips for more on revising.

Revision Tips: Big Picture Items
　　"Big picture items" are elements of the essay that involve the entire essay as a unit, or entire paragraphs. When revising your essay your should first consider these big picture items before considering things such as grammar, spelling, and word choice.
Big Picture Points to Consider
A. Theme and Topics
1、Does the essay answer the essay question completely?
2、Does the essay describe you accurately and completely?
3、Does the essay have a clear and consistant main point? Are all the sections of the essay related to this point?
B. Support and Specifics
1、Are there any important assumptions or background information you do not include that would make your essay easier to understand?
2、Do you go into adequate detail on important points, or do you explain each point only superficially?
C. Organization
1、Does the essay have a logical beginning, middle, and end?
2、Are the essay's paragraphs organized in a logical sequence?
　One way to make sure your essay follows a logical order is to read the essay again, write a one sentence summary for each paragraph, and then check to see if the sentence summaries you have written follow a clear order.
3、Is the essay written as one coherent piece of writing or several unrelated sections?
　An essay should not be organized as separate sections introduced with individual titles (for examples, dividing your essay into the separate sections "My Family," "Educational Background," "Extracurricular Experiences," "Work Experiences," "Career Goals," etc.).
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Revision Tips: Little Picture Details
　　After you have evaluated your essay's big picture items, it is time to take a look at the essay on a sentence and word level. Below are Bob's tips for revising the "little picture details."
Tips on Content/Subject:
1、Remove any facts or specifics that can be found in other parts of your application, such as your transcript or resume. You can refer the reader to other parts of your application by including parenthetical comments in your essay, such as "(see resume)" or "(see essay #2)."
2、Remove any criticism of previous professors, classmates, schools, or programs with which you have been involved.
3、Remove sexist or racist language.
4、Revise any blatant self-promotion, for example "I am not only an outstanding student, but also one of the most generous and giving individuals in my entire university." Detail specific examples and experiences which reveal your positive traits.
5、Remove sentences that begin with "I have always wanted to be..." Do not write about how your interest in your field of study began when you were a small child.
6、Remove empty praises of the school for which you are writing the essay. If you complement a school in a such a general way that you could praise every other school you are applying to the same way, your compliments will be taken by the schools as insincere.
7、Avoid writing with a pessimistic or depressed tone.
Other Tips:
1、Be extremely careful when using modifiers, words like beautiful, wonderful, interesting, challenging, regarding, excellent, and meaningful. Instead of using such common adjectives, describe your experiences as they actually happened.
2、Use transition words like furthermore, thus, additionally, and however, to move from paragraph to paragraph and sentence to sentence.
3、Remove qualifiers like somewhat, partially, possibly, quite, and rather. Qualifiers make the writer seem unsure and unconfident.
4、Try to make your sentences as concise as possible. Remove needless words.
5、Use a thesaurus to replace overused adjectives. Make sure to pick appropriate synonyms.
6、Make sure there are no misspelled words
7、Avoid using quotation marks to highlight "adjectives." Quotation marks should only be used to note dialogue. If you are using quotation marks to surround adjectives it means the adjective you chose does not match your intended meaning. Check a dictionary or thesaurus to find a more precise adjective to use.
And Finally:
Make sure you personally understand every word in your essay

Tips for Writing Business School Essays
　　Business schools often consider application essays a more important part of the application than other graduate programs. This is because business schools believe that job performance and job experience, which are described in application essays, are a better indicator of an applicant's business potential than academic achievement. In writing business school essays you should not only give an accurate, detailed description of yourself but also demonstrate an understanding of some part of the business world (e.g., banking, manufacturing, marketing, or consulting).
　　Here are some tips on answering the most common types of business school application essays.
The Achievement Essay:
　　"What do you consider to have been your single most important achievement to date?"
　　Describe the problem you faced, the steps you took to deal with it, and how you solved it. The importance of your achievement is not all that important. What is important is revealing how you deal with challenging situations. In your answer try to show that you have creativity, initiative and focus.
The Extracurricular Activity Essay:
　　"Describe the non-professional activities you enjoy."
　　This is not a trick question. You do not need to describe only hobbies that are business related. Admissions committees care about what you enjoy outside of work because they want to know that you are a likable person who will fit into their school's student body.
The Character Essay:
　　"What do you consider your best character traits? Which traits would you most like to change"
　　You do not have to answer this question completely honestly. For good traits, try to show that you possess traits that will help you do well in an M.B.A. program, such as the ability to work with others, the ability to self-motivate, or strong analytical skills.
　　As for weaknesses, do not mention character weaknesses such as dishonesty or greed. Rather, discuss weaknesses that can be strengths in disguise, such as being too details-oriented or too curious. Because many applicants will probably mention the same strengths and weaknesses as you, be sure to provide specific supporting evidence.
The M.B.A. and Career Goals Essay:
　　"Why do you want to pursuean M.B.A.? What are your short and long-term career goals?"
　　There are many strong applicants competing with you to be accepted. You need to show the admissions committee why you need an M.B.A. and how you will use it. If studying business represents a big career change or is unrelated to what you studied in college, Try to make pursuing an M.B.A. seem compatible with your interests and skills. Your career goals do no have to be overly ambitious. Modest career goals are fine too. If you do have very ambitious goals, you should also have a realistic plan for attaining them.
The Work Experience Essay:
　　"Describe a significant managerial or other work experience."
　　Remember, your complete work history is already detailed on your resume, so you do not have to restate it when writing this essay. Do not just write a detailed account of all your work responsibilities, but instead focus on one specific project. Try to write about an experience that reveals character strengths or other positives.
The Ethical Essay:
　　"Describe an ethical dilemma that you have personally encountered. What alternatives did you consider and why?"
　　The admissions committee is asking you to prove to that you will be an upright and moral student and business professional. There is no need to praise yourself too much, you can be modest here. Do not describe problems that you caused yourself. If you have not had much work experience, write about a school experience.

Tips for Writing Law School Essays
　　In evaluating application essays, law school admissions officers pay attention both to what you write and to how you write. In terms of content, what you write, the essay should provide another dimension to your application. It should make you stand out and reveal something not already detailed in your application. Do not just recapitulate your grades and LSAT score. Instead, try to write something that can provide evidence you possess the potential to become a successful lawyer. Being a lawyer requires strong morals, attention to details, and the ability to cope with long periods of monotony and boredom.
　　Lawyers generally write a lot and so they need to be able to write clearly and concisely. If you are unsure how to write your essay, the simpler the better. Finally, although some schools do not place a specific limit on the length of the personal statement, do not write more than three double-spaced pages. Most of the time two pages is enough.

Getting Outside Opinions on Your Essay
　　After you feel comfortable with your essay you should show it to a few people whose opinions you respect. These might be friends, classmates, or teachers. If you can, you should also ask for help from a native speaker of English, since he should at least be able to help correct essay grammar.
　　Do not be afraid of your readers' criticisms. After all, you should know your essay's weak points so you can fix them.
　　Listen to outside suggestions and consider them, but do not automatically accept them. Remember that this is your essay. You should use your own judgment in deciding how to revise it.

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